Wine Review #10

Gavi
Cortese 2005 12.5%
Cossano Belbi, Italy

Smell
Smashed up Skittles left in a hot car

Taste
A languid, persistant acridness, not unlike licking a lemon, then orange Starburst for a full 10 minutes

Whippets factor
2/10. My efforts to buzz off the slowly evaporating but highly chilled and pathetically ABV'd booze left me with my nasal cavities full of wine

Top Trumps
Cooking - 9
Name - 4
Buy a case - To leave it for kidnappers instead of cash
Hand to hand combat - 9
Charisma - 2

Not dead, just sleeping

I'm on holiday, done plenty but difficult to convey without the convenience of a digital camera. Use the blog links to have a see what I've been up to.

Now, where is that cheap supermarket piss I got to watch Fear and Loathing to?

Star of the West by the Sea

Or Hesperia del Mar, my hotel in Barcelona. An interesting place, while I have been typing, water has starting pouring through a light fitting and killed the power to the whole restaurant, better move to my room

Now then, what do you make of this menu, I'm starving, but I think I need to choose carefully, otherwise I might be ordering myself a kicking. These more humorous items are quoted exactly from the English language menu, I really am not kidding.

Entrants
Cesar Salad
Rosbeef, foam of cheese, compote of pear cardemomo and sweet fresh quince
Fresh tagliatelis and octopuses in sauce of handle

Fish
Tuna, creamy rice, broth of noras and cloud of idiazabal

Meats
Tail of stewed bull and noodles of sepia
Carre of lechazo roast, shitake, peas yoghurt and reduction of modena

Hmm, not sure what any of that is, so what about the Executive Menu?

First Dish
Salad of outbreaks with shitake and vinaigrette of honey
Artichokes attacked with mash of rucula and powder of ham

Second Dish
Chinstraps of veal with with tortilla of chocolate and Chinese noodles
Loin of cod with vegetables, creaking of leek and green oil

Well, this all sounds very mysterious and not entirely edible, err, Sandwiches?

Sandwich Mixo
Toasted of back with cheese brie
Tortilla to the pleasure

Starvation it is then. By the way, Spanish telly which I witnessed in my hotel during my last week in Redmond is in places EXACTLY how the Fast Show parodies it, especially the quiz shows. Chicks in hot pants and jiggling titties, stupid boinking sound effects, seemingly unachievable and worthless goals and very very stupid contestants. I laughed my nipples off, but not half as much as I laughed at this. There is a burger on the menu, but I can't keep a straight face to order it.

Ate it

Freak weather, the earliest snow at Crystal Mountain for 28 years, meant I was fortunate enough to enjoy a day's boarding on my last weekend in the US.

I learnt to board on artificial snow slopes which only usually had around a 5cm snow depth and made turning hard work, but starting out tough meant it was easy to get the balance, stops and turns right, because here I had about 25 - 30cm of snow to play with.

Starting out on the shallow trainer slopes was a great warm up. Despite me investing in some decent goggles, the snow was coming in fast meaning frequents stops to clean them and whiteouts once I got to the higher, colder slopes. I had to follow a few people down to guide me back to base. I also made it off piste, thanks to some sloppy steering and screamed into a snow drift, landing on my front, looking like a toy soldier clamped in polystyrene. Pinned into the drift by my body weight on the soft, giving snow, I spent 10 minutes trying to reach down my inconveniently long gangly body to my bindings to release the board. Exhausted, I got hold of the board and dragged myself out of the drift. Had a small heart attack, then wrestled with the accursed rental boards quick release mechanism to get back on. Had to spend another 5 minutes digging out compressed snow from the machinery. Avoid these unless you've road tested them.

I ache all over and will be walking like a cowboy for a week or so, but it was all worth it for the 60 seconds where it all came together and I got to shoot down a real mountain at huge speed without tumbling.

Cool Hand Texas No Name Neil the Kid 2 - Rewenge!

Us poker sharks were foolishly invited to a Microsoft colleague's beautiful house for an evening of poker education from her son and his croupier young friends. This is much faster poker that I was used to, with doubling blinds every 15 minutes. Games tended not to last too long and unless you held your nerves and tells in check, you were plundered. Which I was, big fat loser first off the table.

Scorned, I vowed revenge. I inherited another players chips and made a nice stash out of them, before being plundered again, gaaah! So the young 'uns, engorged with success and all my money retired upstairs to continue the game. M'colleague and I played them again, and I carefully danced my way into a healthy looking pot. He tried to make me flap with an all in, but I just caught the tiniest twitch of his little finger as he drew his hand away from his chips and decided to call him. He had nowt, and I smugly retired him from the table. My thirst was up for more casualties, and shooed another guy off the game with the most outrageous bluff, so it was one on one with the last kid on the table. After the river, he called all in, and I couldn't refuse as I was looking at getting an ace high flush, the turn card took me one step closer, then the river card...! Aaaagh! Exactly the wrong card for me and just what my remaining opponent needed. We split the game cash 70\30 so I at least only came away $5 down instead of $20.

Not a bad poker night, but it was a little serious for what was a casual social evening. I reckon I'm ready to hit the high roller tables now.

Nita comes to visit!

I had the pleasure of my girl's company for a week, my company kindly granting my request for conjugal visits while imprisoned in this lab. It was exciting meeting her at the airport, and she took her sweet time getting through customs, having mislaid my address and claiming to have no money on her. US Customs are very officious so she must have charmed her way in, she was very excited to be here.

It was strange having her here as a guest in the apartment, so I had to fetch after her the whole time instead of arguing about who's going to wash the pots. Plus having hardly seen her in 3 months meant we had to get used to each other again as well as show her around this other life I've been living here in the US.

The Sunday after she arrived, we and m'colleague went whale watching with a touring company from Anacortes, about 2 hours drive north of Seattle. It is a good time of year to spot humpback whales but we came across killer whales first, they are not shy creatures, and this took up our time. The whale pods like to hang around at San Juan island (red is where we found them)













Oh look, an eagle!




There was work still to be done here, so while I toiled, Ms Nita explored Redmond, Bellevue and Seattle and then we went on a trip into the enormous countryside. The weather was great to start with at Snoqualmie













We tried to make it to Sunrise to get a good look at Mt Rainer so I could convince mah'aam that it actually existed. By the time we got there, it had wrapped itself up in a huge bank of fog and clouds. Bah!

But it did come out the next day and the only place to view it in a hurry is the Space Needle.








Our chums on Bainbridge Island invited us to a pumpkin party for the Saturday before m'lady had to leave. M'colleague and I had stocked up on tools and practiced on a couple of pumpkins so we went all out and decided to carve a pumpkin inside a pumpkin. We had in mind that if there are all these tools and websites, that these parties are an excuse to compete with your skills, but we were the only ones doing this and it took ages. First of all, we had to go to the pumpkin patch













This is wild corn, very pretty and sadly inedible





And here's what we carved, mine is in the middle and is meant to be a flaming monsters eye behind some trees, and m'colleagues is on the left, a graverobber scene. The one on the right is by Gus, the sarcastic preacher. He provided many good giggles that night.









Here's a whole mess of them. third from the left is Nita's.



I had to drive so it was fun watching everyone stagger to and from the excellent warm cider and rum bowl. We drank this and tea for me around an enormous bonfire, swapping stories of drunken depravity. Despite my best efforts, the preachers story was the grossest, and he wasn't even drunk!


Then the next day, I had to take her to the airport for home, and these next two weeks here are really going to feel long. I've missed family, friends, my house and my girl and I'm getting weary of being here working this hard for this long. I've found a couple of old friends hunting around on the internet that I've not heard from for years which really cheered me up.

M'Colleague and I finally found some drinking buddies, on our last weekend here! Bah, but they will keep for when we come back.

Autumn falls

Autumn in very dramatic here, I think the vegatation was very water starved this summer, despite the Doozers hosing the place down every three days, so there are fireworks on the ground and Turner in the sky.

John Peel Day

Today is one year since my favourite broadcaster threw a seven, so I'm listening to my playlist

Hope you in the UK had a chance to see a band playing today

Hallowe'en soon










Mine is on the right, m'colleague posed, good likeness?

Black, black! The end!

This is good news of course. Our project end day looms, October 16th, and I've just got to host a few international demos to finally have something to show everyone, and release me from these terrible bonds of slavery. At least for a while, there is much still to do.

To help ease the pain, my bit of fluff is coming here to Seattle to see me for a week, so you may see a few more social entries.

The absence of entries so far has been of course due to work, and I haven't the will to whinge about it. If you want an earful, go see m'colleagues blog.

Wine Review #9

Bogle
Cabernet Sauvignon 2003 13.5%
Clarksburg, California


Smell
Winter sea breeze, almonds and leather

Taste
The flintiness of a Sancerre with a smooth meaty redcurrantiness

Whippets factor
9/10, alcoholically modest compared to some of the wines I've reviewed, but is was so tricky to nail down the smell, I've snorted half of it.

Top Trumps
Cooking - 7
Name - 3
Buy a case - Definitely, here's all my money, bring more, now.
Hand to hand combat - 8
Charisma - 9

This week, I are been mostly listenin' to...

John Taverner - Svyati
Steven Isserlis (cello)
Eternal Memory

Ralph Vaughn Williams
Fantasia on a theme by Thomas Tallis (the Ralph and Ted closing credits music)

Raymond Scott - Reckless Nights and Turkish Twilights
The Toy Trumpet (listen and watch the world go by, especially particulary dim people, AKA, Ren and Stimpy background music, the Army episode)

Mark Lanegan - I'll Take Care of You
Shiloh Town

Autechre - Incunabula
Windwind

Radiohead - OK Computer
Karma Police

Monolake - Momentum
Atomium

Plastikman - Consumed
Consumed

Plastikman - Closer
Ask Yourself

Theorem
Plash

Motorhead
Louie Louie
Ace of Spades

PhD
I won't let you down

Pixies - Bossanova
Rock and Roll

The Romper Stomper Orchestra
Pulling on the Boots

The Breeders - Last Splash
No Aloha

Eagles of Death Metal - Peace Love Death Metal
So Easy

The Duke Spirit - Cuts across the land
Cuts across the land
Fades the Sun
Patients
Wooden Heart
The Heart is a Lonely Hunter
Hello to the Floor

Sonic Youth - Dirty
Youth Against Fascism

Dead Kennedys - Fresh Fruit for Rotting Vegetables
Let's lynch the landlord

PJ Harvey - Dry
Plants and Rags

The Undertones
Teenage Kicks


Thankyou to John Peel for the support of most of this music, and the influence it has had.

Wine Review #8

Penfolds
Shiraz (80%) Mourvedre (20%) 14.5%
South Eastern Australia


Smell
Prunes soaked in Armagnac deep inside a granite cave

Taste
Lavender ice cream, blackcurrants soaked in Smirnoff Silver

Whippets factor
8/10, sloshed outback crock botherers straight to the frontal lobes, a ferrrricing noooightmaaare!

Outstanding feature
I don't have to share this one, it's all mine! Also the Mourvèdre calms the Shiraz down a bit, which helps when you are drinking an entire bottle on a school night.

A brief trip home

Hello folks.

Many things have happened, most of all the realisation that 30 mins every odd day blogging is a pain in the ass and it's 30 minutes less I have to spend bathed in the LCD glow of my laptop. My skin is not looking so good.

So while the wife is away in Barcelona, and I'm free from caffeine addled ravings for 72 sweet sweet hours, here's the skinny.

I've been back to the UK to ensure my girl doesn't leave me, we'll see how long that holds, and to beat the visa system somewhat. Work was insanely busy of course, but I managed to hold back a weekend to retreat to Glastonbury with my lady. Jet lag and workaholism had me weary so it took until Sunday for me to wake up a bit.

The only B&B in town with rooms was run by Hare Krishna disciples, something I only twigged when I spotted the orange curtains, pics of indian folk and the odd deity dotted around the house, then finally, the annoyingly repetitive musical mantras they played us for breakfast. They were kind and friendly people though, and made us feel very Hare relaxed and Rama comfortable. I believe it was about 25 Krishnas per person per night, not bad.

We saw Bath, a dump apart from the Roman bits, and the only decent food is the French Bistro round a back street near the Abbey, book a table. We went up to the Tor at midnight in the full moonlight. Of course there were the space cadets up there talking about UFOs, it adds to the magic of the place, but the real show was mist rising from the fields down in the Levels, lifting away from the grass and pouring slowly and gradually downhill over bushes and trees then disappearing.




Worthy Farm minus the Glastonbury Festival





Glastonbury Abbey

I fought the law.....

Drove to the desert today, drove a 370 mile round trip that took in Roslyn and PotHoles reservoir (pics in the can, go see Big Chief Running Mouth's blog for the new fangled digital goblinry) as we drove east of Seattle

The change of scenery from huge trees and greenery to dry scrubland took less than 20 miles, and apart from some stunning lake views it was a bit dull. It's humbling to see how a meagre 4 hours straight driving made a very minor dent inland, and how massive this country is.

Oh yeah, the law thing. Well, Vlad was making a few road movies with his camera so I wanted to get to the bridge bit before it got too dark, and put my foot down somewhat. The Mustang became unstable at 100 mph, almost leaping off the road in fear and providing a sickening body roll that had me sea sick. So, I'm thinking, best keep it to 85-ish. Not much farther on down the road, I came across yet another ex-colonial lumbering along in the middle lane overtaking no-one, and angrily punched the accelerator (1-one thousand, 2-one thousand, 3-one thousrrrrrrRRRRR!) and eventually was granted some power by the all controlling gearbox and whizzed across and around the drooling simpleton. It was downhill a bit, and last time I checked, I'd got up to 85mph, and straight past a state trooper. I think the road movie recorded the dormant vehicle light up and start to roll off the ramp. I expected a mild spanking and a small finelet, the speed limit was 70, but once pulled over, the officer claimed 'my laser never lies Sir!' and a huge and potentially incarcerating 98mph! Having known what that speed feels like and it's stomach churning effects, I thought that had to be wrong, so, I quietly shat myself, but calmly apologised and handed over my UK driving licence, just the card bit. He was at the passenger side, and Saruman laid down some excellent soothing banter as the very young officer tried to rally some anger towards me. He went to his car for a potentially life ruining 2 minutes that had me wondering if they had WiFi in jail cells these days, so I could continue the project. He returned from checking me out, then sent me on my way with a horror story about what might have become of us had we hit an elk. At 98mph. I can only assume it would have been too much hassle to properly book someone with a UK driving licence, I was sufficiently repentant or WormTongue's verbal gossamer had him all weak at the knees. Maybe it was our protestations of 'How DARE you! We're British don't you know, you miserable traitorous Roundhead!'

So right, if the big fella there throws the ball to yer man down there, and he hasn't completed a sack in the 3rd down....uhh, ahhhmmm. Huh?

I agree! The game as a contest SUCKED! The game as a sport is just unbearable. They made 4 x 15 minutes last 3 HOURS! I prefer rugby in a huge way, and the constant stops by the refs, 7 of them, the teams endless interruptions with timeouts and running in to touch with the 'ball' were relieved only by an army of cheerleaders

I'd love to see what a team of rugby players could do to these guys. They train to run around a field for most of their 80 minutes, but the longest play made in this match was about 7 seconds. Then it's time for a group huddle, the ref to swap the ball 7 or 8 times, the team to be entirely replaced during offensive\defensive changes, the cheerleaders to jiggle a little more, a quick mission to retrieve a 'WHAT! 6 BUCKS! Does it produce some kind of dizzying high?' hotdog so they can get their breath back.

And there was this bogling crow creature humiliating himself in between the long dark teatimes of the game

I know now how Americans feel about cricket, so touché

The Fog

Our route, red dot is home. 377 miles

A day off.

On a weekend.

I wasn't getting up in the morning though, had a nice long sleep.


So, we decided to drive to Bremerton and have a look around, and it's not very interesting, so on we went to Lake Crescent at the top of the map.

There are a few legends for this deep deep lake. But I thought it was stunning, driving around it reminded me of a Slovenian postcard, New Zealand (postcard again, I don't get aound much) and Loch Lomond, in bits (bin there.)

We decided that rather than 'Turn Back! Turn Back! My wife! My little children!', despite all the abandoned cars and lack of people and towns and abundance of dark, hairy untouched forests, we could make it to the beach, just, to witness a Pacific sunset.

Then, clouds. The sun vanished and left us under a blanket of grey and alone on a loooong straight road. I was able to drive with my knees for a full seven miles.

The little man in the photo spotted Rialto beach on our way to La Push that he'd seen in a travel blog, and had spooky stone stacks and beautiful sunsets. But when we got there...

The beach is lucky enough to have a river flowing nearby, which means lot's of different coloured shiny pebbles. Edward SausageHands felt right at home, and I knew how he felt to find his beach. Mine is White Park Bay in Northern Ireland (top picture, in link)

Bream?

You definitely had to be there

Hooters

Wow, a Friday evening on the lash to give my bleary eyes and chair ridden arse and it's many sores some air.

This place does the most delicious chicken wings, maybe a close second to Nando's. Trust me, you don't want to go just for the service, ahem, they are tough salesfolk and they harass you! It's supposed to be the other way round. Big smiles, loud voices and they reaaaally put out for tips, you get body parts thrust at you while you're trying to chow on your food. And when you're done, they try and flog you nasty old t-shirts. Every 10 minutes they humiliate a customer who unwisely thought announcing their birthday will get them a free drink and maybe a shag. So conversation is impossible.

Maybe my social intolerance is caused by enforced toil on Milo Minderbinder's evil hamster wheel for 11 straight days!

We were going to cruise for chicks in the Mustang and our outragoeus British accents, but neither of us wanted to remain sober. Instead, we chugged martini's in Daniels and smoked one of their corrugated cardboard sticks they claim to be cigars. NEVER again! Quit hassling the Cubans and let them sell you some real stogies!

Compared to Crowley's martini's, they were a bit watery, and the lemon twist was all straight. This is not a matter of design, you have to twist it to rupture the little cells that hold in the lemon oil in the zest, otherwise you get no pleasant lemoniness.

Our extremely and not over the top polite waitress Sarah from Wisconsin was chatting to us about her trip to Europe, on her own and starting in Rome. We shared our experiences and warned her of the perils of travelling alone in a steamy latin country, especially one of the most insane cities in Europe. Hopefully she'll send us some pictures while we are here next month which we'll post.

Wine Review #7

Camaraderie Cellars
Cabernet Sauvignon 2001 14.4%
Columbia Valley
Washington State


Smell
Cold corporate marble lined hallways and chilli cinnamon

Taste
Like some creosote fingered baker licking redcurrant jam off his fingers. The baker's name is Dave, you feminists!

Whippets factor
8/10, an alcoholic party in your nasal passages

Wood preserver
If injection treated, 7/10

Wine Review #6

Hogue
Columbia Valley 2002
Cabernet Sauvignon 13.9%

The official runner for cornershop piss so far. Not because it's bad but because it's our first el-cheapo. Most wines so far have been above $20, this is $6

Smell
Old men sauna steam and prunes

Taste
Like is been buried and the worms have been at it a bit

Whippets factor
6/10, although reasonably alcoholic, the fumes simply can't be bothered

Suitability as a gulping every hour of every day wine
8/10

Red mist

Too much caffeine makes me VERY aggressive

Watch this space

Wine Review #5

Mason Cellars
Napa Valley 2003
Sauvignon Blanc 13%

Easy single grape, must be COLD! The best tasting US white so far


Smell
Pebbles and fish. Maybe that was just my hand

Taste
Lemon grass juice strained through a mile of flint bedrock

Whippets factor
3/10, but in a good way. The smell\taste takes it's sweet time to experience

Smugness because you're reading about it instead of drinking it
Ear to ear

Wine Review #4

Owen Roe
Abbot's Table 2004 14.6%

44% Cabernet Sauvignon
13.6% Syrah
13% Merlot
9% Cabernet Franc
8% Zinfandel
4.5% Grenache
3.4% Malbec
3% Pinot Noir
1.5% Counoise

!!!

Like many a colonised country, this wine is the bastard mongrel bitch mother whore daddy sister of many gang raping viking grapes. Lord knows how such a mix up was arrived at, I'm thinking a bottom of the vat tourist sell off here, so I'm very suspicious.

Smell

• Dusty old bookshelves in a 16th century library
• Vanilla impregnated slippers
• BOOOZE!

Taste

• 9 volt battery terminals, with light blueberry and mulled orange peel

Whippets factor

• 7/10, sinus scorching booze clouds

Winey giggles

• 6 minutes after first swig

A delicious light gulping wine I would absolutely drink again, once my liver is a little less inflamed

Slavery

While Evil-Eye plays, he makes me stay in and work! On a Saturday no less.

I have to, all the time loafing around here without my UK lab in my first two weeks must be caught up. I'm sure my mitherings about what I'm working on will be very boring, so I'll post when I have been able to leave the flat to do stuff.

I was able to chat to my little brother who has recently become a father, but not my father who had recently become a grandad.










Looking forward to some new Bainbridge wine

Wine Review #3

Hi

Been working loooong hours, I have managed to drink more wine in the few free hours I do have

Vashon Winery Semillon
10317 SW 156th Street
Vashon, Washington 98070
206.567.0055
vashonwinery@yahoo.com

Semiilon

I drank it two evenings ago with some wild sockeye, it was very tasty


Beer and Big Train this evening

'Allo John

Shelob and I are making so much cold cash locked away in the apartment that we decided to buy us a new car each

I was going to get a Corvette, but this is much more modest




















The Fop of course had to be different

The Late Rainier

My camera is an idiot, even for a machine. It has great difficulty in distingushing between small












and faaa-aar away


, so I almost always have to manually focus.

As well as being a thickie, it uses chemical film which means I have to get Old Bob from round the back of the shiny digital processing shop to 'as a go with 'er Sir, them'll be ready in 6 months'

They are a bit more accepting here of the old ways, and agreed reluctantly to transfer my plates to optical media.

Here are a few interweb friendly reproductions

Fay Bainbridge National Park, Bainbridge Island



Seattle, dusk



Seattle fair





Rainier National Park